The Week’s Best Posts: 4/02/2013 – 10/02/2013

Warrior Queen?

Warrior Queen?

Sometimes there are nuggets of troll-like gold amid sensible, reasonable commentary.

They don’t quite justify their own post, but boy, you want to use them.

With that in mind, we’ve eaten our fibre to compile some of the past week’s best posts that didn’t quite make through the knotty bowels of Comment is Freed.

Lunatic debate rages over The Falkland Islands, there is military ranking armpits and even a pill that can cure divorce.

Read on, o’ lonely troll.

‘No such thing as Falkland islanders’, says Argentine foreign minister

By , The Telegraph

This story, and the one immediately below, relate to Argentinian foreign minister Hector Timerman’s recent visit to the UK. During this visit, he claimed there is ‘no such thing as a Falkland islander’. Needless to say, the forums were ablaze with indignation.

Except this poster:

Stoneyjack

Do not, repeat, do not incite the ire of winsome warrior queen Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner [Argentine president]. She is bold, brilliant, beautiful…and belligerent. You have been warned.

Haha … what?

However, the majority did not seemed too cowed by the warrior queen:

RHeaton57 

Time to boycott Argie goods everybody.

beatriz

Look out of the country of origin especially in fruit.

therealpm

Do they actually make anything?

patrickbateman

Corn Beef. And Lloyd Webber wrote a lovely musical about one of their Dictators wives.

Okay, the musical was awful. If I chuck the record away can I keep the corn beef?

No.

skicarver

if I were a falkland islander, i’d be buying guns and ammo by the truck load.

And some corned beef.

swagger

As much as I love this Sceptred Isle and the plight of the Falklanders concerns me, I know I’m not alone among the DT’s male commentators in wondering what de Kirchner’s like in the sack. Probably ain’t a bad shag, as it happens.

Straight from the Alan Partridge playbook of pulling.

UK ‘disappointed’ as Argentina turns down talks over Falklands

by Julian Borger and agencies, The Guardian

SIRBOBPAISLEY

The Malvinas belong to the democratically elected sovereign state of Argentina – end of story. The ‘aliens’ who are currently decamped on the island should be forcibly repatriated to the UK if they wish to continue living under British rule. To deprive Argentina of their rightful claims to Sovereignty over the Malvinas is an insult to natural justice.

‘Forcibly repatriated’ used in a most un-Guardian like manner.

LivAalborg

The globalist Nazis pulling the strings in Holyrood are the same as the puppet masters in Argentina.

‘Globalist’ gives that extra twist of lizard people.

loutraki

[In response to an Argentinian poster supporting the islanders’ right to self-determination…]

@Nicolas2013 – Nice comment which proves my point: ordinary Argentinians are good people.

Really? They’re not all massive shits? No…

starfield 

There’s a hell of a lot of Thatcherites on this thread! Geographically, if it should be a part of any country, it is Argentina, no question about it. It’s not the right of Falklanders as they are the colonialists who are able to live there because the UK lays claim to the islands. That goes entirely against reason. I would give them back to Argentina in the blink of an eye.
Just because a country occupies land, it doesn’t make it justified that they should rule it. If you think it does, you inadvertantly support Adolf Hitler.
I fully welcome any arguments against this.

Bring it, you de-facto Nazis!

What follows are several comments questioning the historical accuracy of Starfield’s post, before…

starfield

@tokaido – Listen, I take back what I said as you’re right with saying that it didn’t actually belong to Argentina. My apologies to everyone for thinking something that was not correct.
And I’m being serious here. I admit my mistake.

Ouch! Burnt by Wikipedia.

It isn’t those who oppose gay marriage who are the bigots – it is the liberals who demonise them

BY Stephen Glover, The Mail

This week MP’s voted to bring gay marriage into law. Some people, sadly, were not cool with that:

JonnyJV, Surrey

If Tony Blair’s great SIN is the Iraq war. Then David Cameron has committed a greater SIN by force feeding this to the British public. He will never be forgiven.

Gay marriage is clearly worse than leading your country to war on back-of-a-fag-packet intelligence for one poster.

nonpc, UK

Sometimes, a nation goes so far off the moral track that it takes an Augusto Pinochet to get it back on the rails again. Now, I am not condoning some kind of militaristic retaliation. What I am saying is we need a LEADER!!! And the tepid, assinine and moribund bunch of useless politicians who think they know better, currently in Parliament, need their BACKSIDES kicking!!

Maybe nonpc has forgotten that 2279 people lost their lives under Pinochet and a further 31,947 were tortured.

Anon_Wales, Wales, United Kingdom

Liberalism and socialism – the two death knells for Britain today. The plan for the utter destruction of our country is almost complete.

The EU lizard people, in co-operation with the masonic Hungarian-afro-carribean arm of the BBC, have almost achieved their sinister end-game! Nurse, the meds!!

My chemical romance: can medicine cure divorce?

by Will Store, The Guardian

Socratesisinnocent

As ever, the reductionists miss the point, not only of the subject, but of life itself.

We humans experience life, and so to have meaning it has to be life as it is, not life as drugs can make us think and feel it is; that’s an evasion. You might as well hire a hypnotist.
Most people have seen the Matrix. Most people would, I think, choose the red pill. We instinctively understand that although reality can feel at times feel meaningless, it is the only place we may one day experience meaning.

Ah, reduct yourself.

Aside from pseudo-intellectual gobbledegook, there was raw emotion in some of the comments…

Jackanapes 

Can medicine cure divorce? I dunno. Can it cure the rage, grief, shattering disappointment, bitterness and disillusionment caused by infidelity?

Insidian

Can medicine cure divorce?
Only if they’ve discovered an antidote to Cheating Bitch.
(Perhaps the mods will know…? xxx)

You can practically feel the hatred seeping through the monitor.

Can Googling be racist? A Harvard study has found racial bias in Google searches. Yet it’s not the search engine but our own prejudice that’s to blame

by Arwa Mahdawi, The Guardian

mojogoat

Descartes didn’t quite say “Bullshitto ergo sum” either. I’m not on Google, yet I seem to exist all the same.

I call bullshitto.

neithereither

In a reversal of the common prefix ‘Im not racist but…’ This year I shall start to begin my sentences with the phrase ‘I am racist and….’

… a total tool.’

sprockethawk

This comment was removed by a moderator because it didn’t abide by our community standards. Replies may also be deleted. For more detail see our FAQs.

Whatever the above post was, it must have been a sweet comment to get the following response…

@sprockethawk –
My armpit tells me that you are a colonel.

Haha. And my groin tells me you’re the duke.

Family Inc.
Saturday Essay: Run your family like a business

By BRUCE FEILER, The Wall Street Journal

Jerry Stevens Wrote:

The great thing about running your family like a business is that when money is tight, you can just lay off a couple of kids.

Yuppy’s Choice?


Margaret Thatcher Statue to Get Second Erection?

Meryl-Streep-as-Margaret--001There is no person with a greater capacity to polarise the British public than Margaret Thatcher. Love her or hate her… well, that’s it really, those are the only two options.

This simmering pot of blinkered hindsight came to another bilious boil this week when it was announced that a statue of Thatcher may be re-erected in her home town of Grantham. The problem is, however, that the people of Grantham don’t really want it and that when it was originally displayed, in 2002, it was decapitated quicker than you can say ‘milk-thieving train-selling Reagan-loving Nazi witch’.

Personally, I think it would be unfair to cause offense to a small community. The best solution would be for it to be painted in black-face, dressed up in a Jimmy Savile jumpsuit, and placed outside a lesbian nightclub, next to a council estate, somewhere up north. With a little gnome hat and a suggestively placed fishing rod. There – equally offensive to everyone.

Incidentally, my suggestion is about as likely as it appearing on Grantham high street, because the whole story is rubbish. The Grantham councilor who initially brought the story to the media’s attention was apparently ‘misquoted’, and the statue’s going to stay wherever it is. This was reported well before many of the comments below were written, but – as ever – don’t let the truth get in the way of a good knee-jerking.

The Telegraph

Grantham not sure it wants Baroness Thatcher statue

She is Grantham’s most famous daughter, but when a statue of Baroness Thatcher was offered to the local museum, it was considered by some to be a dubious honour.

– by Rosa Silverman, The Telegraph

timwookey, Yesterday 05:17 PM

We get a statue of Mandela-a man responsible for the deaths of hundreds through terrorism-yet we cannot have a statue of a politician who represented the very essence of self reliance and hard work.

Over one hundred people recommended that…

marxbrother, Today 03:32 AM

A statue of her and Winston in an imaginary meeting would be superb. The two leaders who saved this country in the 20th century.

We should be very proud to have statues of Maggie. One statue is just not enough!

Sounds tasteful – perhaps they could also be smoking cigars and playing poker?

Proofteller, Today 02:05 AM

Margaret Thatcher, the last British Leader to possess a pair of testicles. Just take a look at the gutless failures we have had since.

You are now picturing Margaret Thatcher’s testicles.

arthurmo, Yesterday 05:44 PM

atavist…………I used to vote Labour but I would spit, piss and crap on any statue of Tony Liar Blair, a truly disgusting man!!

He’s disgusting?

Stuart Moore, Yesterday 06:05 PM

You stand the statue up and there will be a queue of people ready to knock it back down.

When she finally does the world a favour and dies, her grave is going to become a very popular toilet.

The woman is up there with Stalin, Hitler and her old mate pinochet.

This bears emphasis – she is comparable to Stalin and Hitler… oh.

kc_crouan, Yesterday 07:14 PM

…Would be nice if they made the statue of iron and electrified it though, then the caretakers could sweep away the the crispy fried commie vandals the next day

That’s actually not a bad idea. Then we could open a branch of CFC.

quickswimmer, Yesterday 07:52 PM

Its funny that because when I was at school during the 80s there was always blinkin strikes, i remember in particular between the ages of 8 and 10 the dinner ladies were always on strike and we had to go home at lunch time every day for months on end.

Also filling the bath because the water were also on strike.

I fear perhaps someone’s cash-strapped parents were a little economical with the truth when they told them that now the water’s gone on strike too.

guyburgess, Today 12:41 AM

She won the Falklands wars & interest rates at 15% is great if you have savings, productivity rose under Thatcher & the last time we had a trade surplus was under her.

‘Falklands wars’? Tactical mastermind.

quickswimmer, Yesterday 04:03 AM

funnily enough she probably supported the Taliban against the Russians in Afghanistan back then. If you watch Rambo, I think III, its set there and all the islamic fighters are portrayed as heroes fighting alongside the Americans.

People are debating the worthiness of GCSEs and the current curriculum – I say, there’s all the history you need in Rambo movies.

Graculus, Yesterday 03:59 AM

Funny how history repeats itself. I imagine that Roman people had similar feelings when the busts of emperors such as Nero and Caligula were put on public display.

You are now picturing Margaret Thatcher in bed with a horse.

funinabox, Yesterday 05:35 AM

Erecting a statue to a living figure – no matter what you think of her – is tantamount to idol worship and smacks of Nazism and Communism. We’re not in North Korea, Nazi Germany or Soviet Russia. Next you’ll want us all out on the streets hailing our ‘Great Leader’ and marching up and down in smart brown uniforms. Wait until she’s long dead and buried and there is nobody left living who had anything to do with her or her activities.
PS: You might think Grantham deserves a statue of her – deserves it for what exactly? Being a shithole?

That just speaks for itself.

Totally out of nowhere…

EnglishHardman, Today 08:35 AM

I think this sums up what an absolute disaster the whole European project is.

The EU has done nothing good for the EU. They take billions of pounds of British taxpayers money each year, send all their jobless trash to this country and send us horsemeat disguised as beef.

And we’re supposed to be happy about this cultural enrichment?

FUCK EUROPE!

Are you sure you want to? I hear it doesn’t shave its armpits.
And over to the Guardian

Where should they put the marble statue of Lady Thatcher?

A restored 8ft-tall statue of Lady Thatcher needs a home – a decade after it was decapitated by an anti-capitalist protester. But where should it go?

– by Stephen Moss, The Guardian

For once, the Guardian seems to have outdone the Telegraph in the hyperbolic bile-spewing stakes as they answer the question, ‘Where should we put the statue?’

nattybumpo, 07 February 2013 5:58pm

Next to a shop doorway on a highstreet so that all the drunks could piss up against it at throwing out time.

A whopping 240 recommends for that witticism.

j1rag, 07 February 2013 6:21pm

In a lake of boiling fire? Just to give us some comfort as we contemplate her eternal tortures…

Boiling fire?

JudithChalmersPubes, 07 February 2013 6:44pm

Up Bernard Ingham’s arse.

Only picked this because of the bizarre username.

hairymary100, 07 February 2013 8:41pm

Use it as a testing rig for sex toys, then bury it along with the rotten statue.

Ahaha. As amusingly ‘edgy’ as this contribution is, I suspect, and indeed hope, they didn’t create an entirely anatomically correct statue.

ToffeeGuy, 07 February 2013 10:56pm

Put it in her Ritz hotel room to remind her who she is.

That’s not cool. I hope all these ‘right-on’ Guardian types remember this kind of stuff next time someone gets pilloried for being disrespectful to the poor, or the transsexual, or the Alzheimer’s sufferers…

And the last word..

camscotland, 08 February 2013 1:54am

On the bottom of the Thames… chained to the leg of her corpse…

Ooof!


Shock discovery: Internet users prefer cats to irons!

imagesRemember Monopoly? Well, they’ve changed it.

Hasbro, the company behind the capitalist home-wrecker, went all internetty and let Facebook users vote for the token they wanted to neuter and the token they wanted to give a home to.

And guess what? The internet likes cats. Sorry iron.

(pssst… if you stay with this post long enough, there are some premo cute cat pictures towards the end.)

Cat’s got the Monopoly! Fans vote to axe board game’s iron token and replace it with a kitten in global Facebook poll

– by Simon Tomlinson, The Mail

*Sound of deep, hoarse breathing* Sorry, need to catch my breath after reading that headline.

MagicMoonBeast, Nottingham, United Kingdom, 6/2/2013 20:48

This is a most pressing matter…

Yes.

Druidor, Newbury, 6/2/2013 20:25

now what token will the wives use.

Dominic, Surrey, United Kingdom, 6/2/2013 14:47

Should have been a washing machine instead of the cat! My wife would love the game then.

Jeez, finding sexist posts on the Mail’s website is as easy as finding masculine disappointment in middle management.

oxfordian, Oxford, United Kingdom, 6/2/2013 17:20

Oh no, a cat (again)!! Do they know that a new study has found that In the United States alone, cats are responsible for killing between 1.4 ¿ 3.7 billion birds and 6.9 ¿ 2.7 billion small mammals a year. Killing machines. There are too many of them.

And the number of deaths attributed to Monopoly figures is?

TimothyQ, Norwich, United Kingdom, 6/2/2013 14:42

The iron has been ditched in favour of a cat, a pet, a luxury. Surely a sign of a more entitled and idle generation. BRING BACK NATIONAL SERVICE.

BRING BACK SENTENCE CASE!

Man, I wonder how this news is going down across the pond?

Out with the iron, in with the cat: Monopoly has a new token

By Ed Payne and Michael Pearson, CNN

Hard Little Machine • 10 hours ago 

I was hoping for something more urban like a crackpipe.

John Schneider  G_Edwards • 6 hours ago

And, of course, when a child would bring that Monopoly token to school, they would be suspended for the zero tolerance policy to weapons.

Adam Boatz  Hard Little Machine • 9 hours ago

Not sure that A) you’d want kids playing a game with crackpipes, and B) people pursuing millions in real estate would care about crackpipes.
Try to find an urban monopoly game (since there are a gazillion Monopoly variants, I’m sure there is one).

alwayshaveaquestion  Adam Boatz • 7 hours ago

Its called ghetto-opoly. lol. no, really…

Really: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ghettopoly

Ginger LaConte • 8 hours ago

WOW….Where are the proofreaders, who ever wrote this article misspelled the name of the game in the title of this article… “Monoply”. WTH.

Good spot, Ginger. But where is the question mark? Has the internet voted the question mark off the island to be replaced by 3>?

(I’ve just Googled ‘3>’. There is no way that that looks like a heart. If I had to guess, I’d say it looked more like a pair of balls in a vice.)

Tim Prescott • 10 hours ago 

Neither the shoe nor the iron should go. They have been there from the very beginning.

The times they are a changing. Plus, Hasbro’s PR department needs mouth-breathers to comment on this story, otherwise they lose a kneecap.

First Last Tim Prescott • 10 hours ago

the iron should go, it is completely outdated

Umm, what do you use to … like … do the ironing? Rub your hands together and press real hard on your clothes?

Dale Bowles • 11 hours ago

The new token should be of Uncle Sam standing with his handout.

gbgentleman  Dale Bowles • 11 hours ago

What? I thought an elephant take a crap would be a better symbol.

To paraphrase the films of Michael Bay, “This shit just got political.”

PatMoe • 2 hours ago

I hate cats. They should only be used as taco meat and never as game pieces.

I wonder in real life (i.e. not in troll wonderland) if PatMoe would eat el gran taco gato.

You’re almost at the cute cat pictures. Not far to go, I swear.

Monopoly can haz [sic] new cat token: Facebook voters replace the iron with a feline

By Nathan Ingraham, The Verge

Whole load of cat [sic] in that headline. Hopefully Ginger’s on the case.

The tone of Verge’s comments can be summed up by the following two posts:

mrsbelpit

[The picture of the Monopoly cat is] so cute I will be buying the new set. Kitties!

KittenAppreciatorUSA

Excellent!

Cats+Internet is working.

10% of all posts can be summed up by the following.

mrsbelpit

Frowning Cat

Okay, picture of a frowning cat. My Facebook feed is full of them.

mondeca 

There was no room to comprimise:

hey-i-am-iron-cat

If you look at the cat’s front paws, it looks like the owner has taped the cat to the iron.

EA575

28160899

I get it! Cats can look mildly miffed, too!


Miriam Margolyes leaves UK for Australia

Miriam Margolyes leaves UKSo you’re a distinguished elder stateswoman of the UK thespian scene. But the calls haven’t been coming in of late and the lime light is starting to dim a little.

What do you do?

Well if you’re actor Miriam Margolyes you do a Gérard Depardieu / Brigitte Bardot number and do-one abroad – specifically, Australia. In the process of emigrating, you denounce the nation that spawned you as a class-ridden cesspool, filled with scum bags who wouldn’t look out of place being ventilated by Liam Neeson in Taken 3.

As one can imagine, this incurred the wrath of the forums.

First a comment from Richard, a troll on the Daily Mail:

Richard, Torrevieja, 28/1/2013 11:09

Who?

Good question. I had to Google Miriam Margolyes myself, after spotting the story had drawn over a thousand comments on the Guardian.

Answer: Actress who appeared in Blackadder.

So how did Margolyes herself describe her new found status:

‘I think I should be described as ‘bi’- not bisexual because I’m not – I’m gay – but ‘binational’ because I retain British nationality and I add to it being Australian, which is like having your cake and eating it.’

And then every other cake in the bakery.

Five reasons to leave Britain

– Victoria Coren, The Guardian

Depressingly, quite a few comments focussed on Coren’s marriage to comedian and fellow columnist David Mitchell.

These came in two flavours: ‘You’re not David Mitchell. I like David Mitchell … I’m secretly afraid of women’ and ‘Did David Mitchell teach you how to write?’. If these passive-aggresive sexist comments had a designer fragrance associated with them, it would probably be called Julian.

Example:

Cussutduck 03 February 2013 2:22pm

Is she trying to be funny like David? David is funny. Where’s he then?
I think this country is pony because it calls itself a member of Europe but none of us can go to mainland Europe without paying quite a lot of money. I would rather live in mainland Europe and feel properly European, or not have to pay all that much to go there.
That’s not meant to be funny.

I hear Belarus is cheap this time of year.

CityGardens 03 February 2013 5:43pm

Earlier today, at 11.34am, I posted a very brief, one-sentence comment here stating simply that I found Victoria Coren’s article superficial and trite and not worthy of The Guardian. My comment received half a dozen recommends . . . and it has now been removed, to be replaced by “This comment has been removed by a moderator.”

Is this the liberal, left-leaning, honest-talking Guardian . . . or a paper now emulating the organs of the Third Reich?
Shame on you, Idiot Guardian Moderator! Shame on you!

An act of moderation causes one mouth-breather to compare a leading investigative newspaper with one of the architects of National Socialism.

Nadia Di Martino 03 February 2013 5:29pm

Five? Only five? I have at least 5 million reasons to give you on why I left Britain. If anybody want to hear them here I am.

I suspect that the five million reasons are actually five million signatories to have this poster removed from the UK.

martinusher 03 February 2013 4:58pm

The depressing thing about modern England is discovering that historically its the norm. Those of us who were born baby boomers, the post WW2 generation, were brought up in a false world, a place which was pretty good and apparently likely to get better.

[More of this kind of ‘insight’ before…]

As for me, I legged it. Most other societies wouldn’t stand for the kind of government that rules England, one that has absolutely no interest in the welfare of its citizens (sorry, “subjects”). That doesn’t mean that everywhere else is better (and the indomitable English character born of putting up with this BS is still very much in evidence) but at least you get a chance.
I blame it on 1066 myself….

I’m sure the people of, say, all the failed states in the world, wouldn’t mind giving the coalition a shot.

monkey999 03 February 2013 2:08pm

I left Britain because I couldn’t stand it about 15 years ago. I came back last year because I couldn’t stand the other country I was living in.
Wherever you go, there you are. Please just learn to stand yourself.

Hehe. You can’t emigrate from yourself: If you were a tool in one country, you’re still going to be a tool in another country.

ozzydave 03 February 2013 12:19pm

been saying it on here for years….get the hell out of dodge. anything short of that is child abuse. yeah, oz has got its faults, but it’s nothing that a decent salary won’t cure. freeeeeedom!

Winner of the hyperbolic comment of the day award! If your not gone in the next sixty seconds, well you might as well be a child molester.

TomReeve 03 February 2013 11:52am

Oh, poor Victoria – are you (privately educated/Oxford graduate), your husband (privately educated/Cambridge graduate) and your friends (mostly privately educated/Oxbridge graduates) sick and tired of hearing about the class system? Does it not seem odd to you that a disproportionately high number of the top jobs in the UK (including journalism, comedy and the arts) are held by people who wear an old school tie?
Odd, but for all your satirical, witty and populist commentary, we don’t hear you commenting about that, do we? I wonder why…

These kind of inferiority-complex comments litter The Guardian’s comment section like half-read Don DeLillo novels in the flats of North London.

Smoore1 03 February 2013 10:15am

The worst things about the UK are

1 To many foreigners
2 The Tory party
3 Political correctness
4 Bean counters masquerading as management

chillisauce 03 February 2013 10:21am

I presume you mean ‘two many foreigners…’

‘W’ is seven characters away from ‘O’ on the keyboard.

Actress Miriam blasts English class system as she becomes an Australian citizen

– By ALASDAIR GLENNIE, The Mail

Jordi, Camden, United Kingdom, 28/1/2013

She’s a very nice person and a brilliant actress, good luck to her, I’d leave this country too if I could, it’s too full of spongers and moaners.

A meta moan?

Ben, Wolverhampton, 28/1/2013 12:17

i don’t care, she’s not a nice lady.

What did she do to Ben? Not return his football when he kicked it into her garden?

shirley1919, brentwood, 28/1/2013 15:17

i sincerely hope she is is not receiving a pension from the UK

That’s just cold.

Lesbian actress Miriam Margolyes becomes Aussie citizen

– Joe Morgan, Gay  Star News

Maybe we should all take note of Terry’s comment on Gay Star News:

Terry Stussy

You’re all just Hateful. This does not affect you in the least. Wish her well and move on.


Icelandic girl wins right to be called by own name

tumblr_ltg4kp8x8n1qgpnw1o1_500You wouldn’t think that the country that gave us the Eyjafjallajökull volcano was all that fussy about names, but apparently it is.

A fifteen-year-old Icelandic girl has won the right to be called by her given name, ‘Blær’, despite the fact that it doesn’t conform to Iceland’s strict naming standards.

This is clearly good news for Blær, who was previously officially referred to as simply ‘Girl’; and also for the rest of us – it presents an excellent opportunity to bring out those old chestnuts about silly names. Good wholesome fun…

The Guardian

Icelandic girl wins right to be called gentle breeze

Court rules Blær, which means ‘gentle breeze’, can be legally used as 15-year-old’s name despite opposition from authorities

Associated Press, the Guardian

 

seejaybee

31 January 2013 3:31pm

Nearly as funny as New Zealand, where they also like to be a bit fussy about how kids are named. From 2008:

“A nine-year-old girl whose parents named her Talula Does the Hula From Hawaii was put into court guardianship in New Zealand so that her name could be changed.

[snip]

In his written ruling, [the judge] said names such as Stallion, Yeah Detroit, Fish and Chips, Twisty Poi, Keenan Got Lucy and Sex Fruit were prohibited by registration officials. Others that were permitted included twins called Benson and Hedges, other children called Midnight Chardonnay, Number 16 Bus Shelter and, the judge added, “tragically, Violence”. Another mother tried to use text language for her child’s name, he said.

[snip]”

Can you imagine how high you’d have to be to seriously consider calling a child ‘Sex Fruit’?

viewfrSc

31 January 2013 1:04pm

In Italy, a court ruled against a child being named “Friday”; similarly, a court ruled against a girl being named “Andrea”, which, in Italian, is a male name. I think people should be able to name their children as they should without the intervention of the state.

yours faithfully,

Burst Condom

Teehee.

CS1976

31 January 2013 3:43pm

[…] Coincidentally, I read this article just after reading this one http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2013/jan/31/man-convicted-gun-mark-duggan which involves the unfortunately named “Desire Cox”

Heh.

jet199

31 January 2013 3:33pm

[…] I know a girl called Stevenetta after her father. Much better than Steve because it’s proper feminine and everything.

Oh dear.

baggage

31 January 2013 4:00pm

I lived on a Caribbean island for a few years, and on that island many children were given first names after the father but varied to suit the gender.

They had an obitury spot on the radio each morning (did I mention it was an exciting place to live?) and used to tell you who had died, and then list out the children etc left behind.

I remember on occasion when a Kenneth had died and he left a son Kenneth, and daughters Kennesta, Kenelda, Kenetta……

‘KenEll!

fememi

31 January 2013 1:17pm

[…] There are lots of funny names (from English-American origin) in Spain, e.g. Kevin Costner de Jesús.

Sounds like a post-modern super hero.

Mandragola

31 January 2013 2:16pm

My neice has “Danger” as one of her official middle names. It’s on her passport and everything. What a prat my brother is. Hope they introduce retrospective legislation here, if only so that we can enjoy throwing rotten fruit at parents who inflict crap names on their progeny.

[…]

Wow, that’s cool. I’m pleased someone actually had the stones to do it.

Billbc

31 January 2013 4:46pm

This topic really seems to appeal to the intellectual side of the Guardian’s readership …

Pfft. Killjoy. Perhaps this is more your cerebral speed.


Exposed Ladies Seek Revenge on ‘Revenge Porn’ Site

paris-nightvision-sfw‘Revenge porn’ is the practice of disgruntled and bereft ex-boyfriends uploading intimate pictures of their recent rejecters on niche websites for the titillation of hairy-palmed basement-dwellers and the overly-curious. Or so I’m told.*

A group of women who have been victims of this practice have decided to launch a class-action law suit against one of these websites.

The debate here is relatively straightforward – don’t write anything down that you wouldn’t want your mother to read; don’t text pictures to your boyfriend of yourself squatting over a cucumber if you can’t accept the fact that, one way or another, it will eventually end up on the internet. It will. On the other hand, the site in question, texxxan.com, posted pictures of some of these heart-breaking Texan belles along with their full names and zip codes. That’s obviously not cool and clearly shouldn’t be allowed.

Anyway, in true internet fashion, both sides pushed their arguments to the limits of sanity; while the sweaty-backed middlemen were content just to sit back and enjoy the view…

* I only use these sites because I don’t understand how to back up my photos to iCloud.

New York Daily News

Revenge porn? Women sue website charging X-rated pics of them were uploaded on site and rated without their knowledge

More than two dozen women have joined a class-action lawsuit against Texxxan.com saying intimate photos of them were uploaded by slimy ex-beaus.

Carol Kuruvilla / NEW YORK DAILY NEWS

SpiderHeMan13 hours ago

What are these girls crying about? There is nothing on this website that they are not flaunting in the street every day to the same amount of traffic. You wanna get sued? Try getting these girls to actually WEAR some clothes for a change.

Uh oh, the ‘asking for it’ argument rears its head…

Spewitup, 21 hours ago

Look at these chicks, all painted up and pretty for the camera. What sort of girls send nude pictures to guys after only a few months? This sort…(I’d be surprised if they haven’t put pictures up on the net themselves) oh, but I guess that’s not the point is it.

Sort of like girls who wear their boobs out and complain about old men looking. You’re an idiot if you trust a guy who “coaxes” you into sending photos, perhaps you didn’t need much coaxing.

And there it is again. Sounds stupid at the best of times, but in this context, it’s totally idiotic.

Rush Lemming, 5 hours ago

 And we hear from the caveman contingency. Dope.

This summer, from the producers of the Bourne Supremacy… The Caveman Contingency. Dope.

bk1121122 hours ago

 So you send an intimate pic to a significant other and it’s fair game for the world? That’s weak. The ladies had bad judgment in picking jerks for the role.

But the gentlemen had good judgement in jerking pics! Zing! AHAHAHAHA!

Coffeetweaker, 22 hours ago

 This web-site is nothing more than a modern scarlet letter, attempting to control women by shaming them for their bodies. I will ever give naked pics to anyone ever again.

[sigh]

The misogyny here is palpable. The commenters here certainly don’t know these women personally but appear to be projecting their cuckolded rage onto them. In my opinion this situation should be included under “hate crime” legislation if it isn’t already, as it involves an aggressor hatefully trying to humiliate someone based on their biological gender. Additionally, it may incite violence against the victims. If someone is considered a “slut,” then they are no longer a “nice girl” and lose “male-protection.” Predators are then socially free to do whatever they want to them, as they obviously “asked for it.” Dead prostitute jokes have a grain of truth to them (nobody cares). The aggressors are essentially stripping these women of their humanity and indirectly endangering them. Our society disgusts me.

Hey, have you heard the one about the dead prostitute? No… neither have I.

Jerk Face, 1 day ago

 www.texxxan.com you say? Damn being on my work computer…This is great publicity for that site, and I’ll be sure to check it out later….silly girls

Unfortunate username…

TheChris, 2 days ago

Maybe it’s just nit-picking – but – pictures are not porn….and they’re not x-rated unless there’s somebody else in the picture…..

You can see a cat in the background of one of them – does that count?

Not a member yet, 2 days ago

 32years old…Your more dumb then the girls.

Ooof!

Noo Yoka, 2 days ago

 Each of the victims needs to visit a copyright lawyer and copyright there images. They can charge 1 million each for each “authorized view” then send their ex’s an invoice for the viewings. Once the bill collectors get involved, the boyfriends will commit suicide.

Idiotic on multiple levels.

MarcDonato, 2 days ago

 See? That’s why you have to make sure that you have an Ace in the hole, as they say….my wife’ll NEVER put anything of me up on the web because I have a few of HER tucked away in a secret safety deposit box! Gotta cover your bases!

That’s… that’s something.

The Guardian

‘Revenge porn’ is about degrading women sexually and professionally

What does it say about society that websites where angry men shame their ex-lovers are thriving?

– Jill Filipovic, The Guardian

OlympicSquashNow, 29 January 2013 4:49pm

it sounds like an interesting idea in some cases – revenge comes in many forms after all, often best served cold. Women also have very nasty ways of exacting revenge

I feel this person may have interests beyond squash.

GreenLake, 28 January 2013 10:59pm

I don’t know if Brett Favre or Anthony Weiner sending images of their genetalia counts as “sexting” or sexual harassment, but it certainly turned out to be a problem for them.

Anthony… what?

pimpmasterkdogg, 28 January 2013 10:57pm

[…]

Don’t give your kids a name that is easy to Google, and if someone you know in real life is harassing you over the internet, get the police involved.

That’s a good point – I’ll name my first-born Justin Bieber.

djjdd, 28 January 2013 11:03pm

periods (menstruation for non-UK persons), painful and lethal childbirth, the minute we garner the energy and coldness to do it to them, it will cease to exist…

What.

JustJusty, 29 January 2013 12:28am

 Why we are not protecting children? why we don’t care that first ‘sexy’ images 10& 11 year old girls see are hard core porn? this is overwhelming how easy is free access to pornography! Is it really what we want for the children?

Interesting that someone’s mind instantly leaps from ex-girlfriend revenge porn to images of 10- and 11-year-olds.

ConorSean, 29 January 2013 12:53am

Not exactly scientific but I found this after at the top of the list after one google search:

exboyfriend-pictures.com

It comes with the instructions:

Is your ex-bloke LAZY, USELESS or just a complete BASTARD?
Of course you want TO GET EVEN and get one up on him.
Register with us by CLICKING HERE.
Upload his photo or video in any format, tell us his name, just add a few words to SLAG him off and we’ll get him seen acrooss the whole internet YES YES YES
So don’t delay, get your own back, and give us girls something to laugh at!

Nice.

tankerton, 29 January 2013 4:29pm

Porn is out of control in the UK. Why are all those channels available on Freeview, when so many children have TVs and mobile phones?

It was a much healthier situation in the 70s and 80s, where you were rightly made to feel a bit guilty and dirty if you wanted porn.

Much healthier.

bobbymac1956, 29 January 2013 4:36pm

The rise of internet porn has gone hand in hand with the demise of home shopping catalogues and Elastoplast coloured foundation garments modelled by peoples aunties .Ah simpler times.

Simpler times, good times.


Fawlty Towers BBC Race Row

manuelThe BBC found itself in yet another ‘damned if they do, damned if they don’t’ situation this week when they chose to retrospectively censor an episode of Fawlty Towers. The scene in question involved ‘the Major’ using the N-word. It’s well written and quite funny – in context.

On the other hand, perhaps we should accept the fact that it’s not acceptable to use the N-word pre-watershed.

To be fair to the swivel-eyed knee-jerkers commenting at the Daily Mail, the paper cunningly buried the text of the article in a sea of youtube videos of John Cleese doing his Hitler impression; so, some misunderstanding overreaction is to be expected.

The Mail

Don’t mention the ***: Censorship row as BBC cuts the Major’s ‘racist’ lines from classic Fawlty Towers episode

Laura Cox, The Mail
First up, clever acronym watch:

BBC . Brussels Broadcasting Company .

bill, Lowestoft, 23/1/2013 15:56

And we have to even pay to be brain washed! The British Brainwashing Company it to dangerous now it has to be folded up for the sake of freedom and Democracy!

john, whatswasafineplacetolive, United Kingdom, 23/1/2013 12:11

Big Brother Corporation is watching you!

Anti-Anti, Huntingdon, 23/1/2013 7:44

Isn’t that on Channel Five now?

The Bolshevik Broadcasting Company strikes again and undermines one of the greatest shows it ever produced. What next changing the name of The One Show in case numbers 2 to 10 get upset?

Brian, Broken Britain, 23/1/2013 9:43

There must be someone in the BBC whole went through the programme before transmission to make sure “they” would not be offended. How very Patronising and Condescending. The true meaning of PC.

Mike, London, 23/1/2013 9:04

So we can no longer laugh at something that was made 38 years ago! All of this politically correct and anti-discrimination is gone way too far, it’s an absolute joke. Other countries must laugh at us thanks to the Bye Bye Civilisation (BBC) censoring anything that one person might find offensive. I thought they stopped censoring theatres in 1968, surely TV and radio wouldn’t be fixed soon after?

DisaterX, Bedford, 23/1/2013 0:27
And the rest of it:

The Beeb is like a Greek guy who has suddenly found pink toilet paper in his toilet.

Davewhoever, Gloucester, 23/1/2013 0:38

Admittedly, I don’t know too many Greek guys, but I have absolutely no idea what this means.

…I don’t want to live on this planet anymore.

pragmatica, Manchester, UK, 23/1/2013 1:27

A line from an episode of Fawlty Towers got cut… Goodbye cruel world!

Ahh , the days when we could just enjoy a good comedy , i’ll bet even the Germans laugh at this one .

Derek, London, 23/1/2013 1:53

Hmmmm

Ridiculous to airbrush a comedy show. Just listen to the lyrics of most rap – hip hop music today!!!

Viv, London, 23/1/2013 5:22

I think you’re missing a crucial nuance…

Soe people are racist……………Get over it.

Peter Pan, Neverland, 23/1/2013 6:42

Pfft, yeah – racism, get over it.

Ridiculous. Next Shakespeare will be edited. What’s wrong with people.

me, here, 23/1/2013 6:44

Next?! This is such a common phenomenon that it has its own verb.

A few years ago in Preston I was selling some small blackboards for children. Allt he white people came to me asking how much are the chalkboards. All and I mean all my Asian customers asked me how much were my blackboards.

PaulDavis, York UK, 23/1/2013 9:07

Haha… what?

Perhaps Josef Goebbels is alive and well as DG of the BBC!

Citizen Smith, Billericay, 23/1/2013 9:18

The person responsible for cutting a line from Fawlty Towers is comparable to the architect of the Holocaust.

The BBC is the biggest fascist organisation in this country. If you dont follow their ‘PC’ agenda your ridiculded.

Ridiculdous!- swanseajosh86, Swansea, Algeria, 23/1/2013 9:57

The BBC did the same edit nonsense with an episode of “Some Mothers Do Ave Em” Frank Spencer in the 3rd series during the moving house scene where Frank falls out of the back of removal van and into a vat of boiling tar by the side of the road, where a Indian man offers to help Frank out of the tar, Frank replies “White man thanks Indian brother” then the Indian man offers Frank a cup of tea, all this was oddly edited out on DVD versions as Franks comments & conversation in the scene were all polite, and friendly so why was it edited ??

birdland, Watford, United Kingdom, 23/1/2013 10:03

I guess you had to see it.

Britain HAS REALLY gone down the drain! Now just WHY, WHY, WHY should we change OUR way of life just to please a minority group. Our fathers who perished FOR NOTHING in 2 world wars would turn in their graves!!!!!!!!! R.I.P. “britain”

True British Patriot, London, United Kingdom, 23/1/2013 10:14

Uhhh… it’s a line from a 38-year-old sitcom.

Dont know if you have noticed but eastenders don’t even swear anymore. so unrealistic

Zoe, Hull, United Kingdom, 23/1/2013 10:24

Heh.

Reminds me of the defacing of the Greek and Roman statues! Pitiful bigotry! In the same spirit erase everything about slavery from history books???

Mario Kassianides, London, 23/1/2013 10:48

Ladies and Gentlemen of the Royal Academy – I present to you – Michaelangelo’s ‘The Germans’!

They did the same with FRIENDS before it was handed over to Comedy Central the people at E4 cut out all the gags n censored everythin to the point that nothing made sense

mrs.b, lancs, 23/1/2013 11:37

Oh, so that’s why it’s not funny.

I phoned the BBC to complain and was told by the chap who took the call not to use language like that !!!!!!! you really couldnt make .

Michael the un pc, sittingbourne, 23/1/2013 11:41

Haha, what a conversation that must’ve been.

Q: What is the difference between the BBC censoring historic screenplay and Hitler burning history books? A: No difference, they’re both examples of depraved minds seeking to impose their minds on society, just because they can. We fought a war to stop that kind of behaviour and of all the likely suspects, who’d have thought the BBC – Voice of freedom and truth – would be the ones to step up and assume the mantle of a dictator wanting to change history!

Gwyn, Newport, United Kingdom, 23/1/2013 12:31

Uhhh… A: BBC is Hitler?

I have met quite a few German people over the last few years – a sure ice-breaker is “Don’t mention the War – I did it once but I think I got away with it”. Never fails to get a laugh.

Frank, Wirral, 23/1/2013 14:02

Really?

How can it be racist when Germans and British people are both white?

Mary, Montreal, 23/1/2013 15:33

Germans are slightly whiter.

Will please the readers of the Guardian

Psd, Hants, 23/1/2013 7:04

Will it? Let’s find out:

Fawlty Towers isn’t racist. Major Gowen is.

To make a show of the fact that you know what the Major’s surname is is as bad as being a  terrble racist.

spontaneityrox

23 January 2013 4:49pm

Our country sucks now, you can’t say anything without making someone cry. And since we have the internet, they let everyone know that they’re crying about it.

Lame. They’ve even made the internet a rubbish place to be.

Beautiful. Perfect

HappyValley, 23 January 2013 5:12pm

In Spain they made him [Manuel] into an Italian

If that’s true, that’s hilarious.

loftytom, 23 January 2013 5:51pm

Erm, Manuel was a Catalan
“I come from Barcelona”

scientific

Piss off.

23 January 2013 5:01pm

Even when I was at stiff-upper-lip public school, we were very nearly (and not quite) allowed to use the word “nigger” in a sentence as long as it was part of a quote. That was mid-70s!

How can you very nearly use a word?

FiniteMonkey, 23 January 2013 5:42pm

Possibly, although it didn’t stop the Beeb from wonderfully showing the full opening titles to last week’s teatime episode, complete with Flowery Twats sign (which I still honestly find the funniest thing from all 12 brilliant episodes) to what seems like absolutely no complaints whatsover 🙂

Hehe, yeah.

Over at the Telegraph

Why can’t we laugh at the old jokes any more?

A ‘racist’ joke in Fawlty Towers has been cut because it might offend. Well, it might – if you didn’t get the joke

eric_the_scot

6 minutes ago

It’s supposed to be a comedy , e.g. funny. I suggest those “offended”  should grow a thick skin. We have always laughed at ourselves in this country , it is part of being British. If I had a pound for every time I’ve been called “sweaty sock” I’d be rich.I don’t need some corrosive but influential jumped up, multi-kulty  broadcaster telling me what is acceptable or not.

dh48

‘Sweaty sock’?

42 minutes ago

 I’ve got a jumper that says ‘Bring back (picture of a Golliwog)’

I haven’t dared wear it yet.

Bet this will be censored – sorry, moderated.

Wow. Christmas must be wild round yours.

lordmuck

5 hours ago

Arrant nonsense.  Amongst continentals,

The Nordics come first.
Then the Portuguese…never fought ’em
Then Gerry…sneaking regard for their efficiency and self-control

Afraid Johnnie Frog comes v near the bottom.

That’s it Tim – racist Top Trumps. The future beckons…

NAGGERS_b9e82b_2494975